Hi, there.

heliolisk:

is dat pitbull

Make me choose between ___________ or __________.

(via sadblogger)

In the delivery room

tokomon:

mother: is it a boy or a girl?

doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor

(via sadblogger)

kingjaffejoffer:

When someone with stank ass breath talks to you really close
loserpoet:

it’s a metaphor
>